you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Randomize
