Dual....:-)
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize
