ya dads aren't the best wingmen
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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