I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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