So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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