Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Say something about gay babies.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
