She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
