I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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