is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
