i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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