whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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