I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize