That's intense
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
