It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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