a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
