Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
