I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize