its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
