Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Randomize