Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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