my soul wont recognize me after tonight
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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