ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
