I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize