you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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