She said her name was "party"
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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