We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
