my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I love having hate sex.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
