He disabled his match.com account in front of me
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
