I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize