Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
