i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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