All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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