guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize