Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
