Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
