I want to have your abortion
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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