so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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