are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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