we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
