its not stalking. its research.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
We're too hungover to prance.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
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