fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Randomize
