NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
