3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
