What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
