Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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