sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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