Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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