We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
