Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
