it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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